Week 28, day 3

I could stand in front of the mirror all day and look at my funny little body. I look like Tweedle Dee. Or Tweedle Dum. Funny!

I probably need to get on the ball about finding some child care for the Bean Sprout soon, so that I can relax and birth him when that time comes. I know that the right situation will present itself and it will be affordable and we will feel good about the whole thing.

Oops, I just got hungry again. Being pregnant involves a lot of food. It’s hard to eat 3000 calories a day. I could do it in one meal at Chilis, of course, but that’s not a good idea, so I’m eating a schload of healthy foods. I have been having a bowl of ice cream in the evening though. Right now it’s Moose Tracks, which is chocolate ice cream with a fudge swirl and little peanut butter cups. Yum.

Week 28, day 2

How does the song go? “My feet hurt, my back aches, and I don’t believe in Jesus.” My feet don’t hurt; my back feels great thanks to my awesome chiropractor and strong muscles; and Jesus seems like an OK guy to me, some of his followers notwithstanding. My broken record today goes something like – my nose is runny and itchy, my poor dog is broken, and I’ve completely outgrown my tolerance for people who don’t understand or have respect for the incredibly well-wrought set of standards set forth by the Bill of Rights. Which is nearly everybody I interact with on a daily basis, goddamnit.

When I’m in a mood this nasty, I should really just stay away from people, so it’s a good thing I don’t have any meetings or reference desk hours today at work. It’s just me and my computer and my to-do list today. Thank God.

On the positive side, Barry got home last night, so I got to sleep next to my man. Which is nice, because right now I feel as if he’s my only friend in the world.

Oh dear, I’m whining again. Not good. Let’s start over with a new song:

My honey got home safe. We dropped the dog and her swollen infected foot off at the hospital this morning. They will take good care of her. I may be strident in my ethical and political beliefs, and I may be a dork, and I may be shy and that may mean I don’t have many friends, but at least I’m authentic and individual. We have plenty of food to eat and a really nice roof over our heads. I have a healthy little boy in my belly, growing stronger each day.

In truth, all is well with my world.

Week 28, day 1

Ugh. Raisin went in to check on her case yesterday and Rainy, her rehab coach, had to cut the foot part off because she has a staff infection from getting it wet chewing on it. It’s like foot rot, all nasty and itchy. So then I bought a blow dryer to use to dry her foot out after she gets it damp walking in the grass, took her home and gave her a peanut butter Kong, then went to get a pedicure.

When I got home her foot was swollen up to twice its normal size. I had to drive her back to the vet to get a pressure wrap put on it and Rainy gave me an E-collar twice as huge so that she couldn’t reach her foot to chew on it. Then last night she got to it anyhow and chewed the wrap off and now her foot is swollen and there’s nothing I can do because it’s Sunday. Screw it, she’ll live.

So then she wanted to sleep with me and I let her at first because I’m a sucker for a pitiful beast, but she kept kicking me so I had to kick her out of bed. I got about 2 hours of sleep and I’m allergic and my sinuses are clogged and swollen. I feel like complete crap. Normally two sudafed and I’d be fine, but no relief for the pregnant lady. I tried a hot shower and saline sinus spray with no luck.

When people complain about sleep deprivation with newborns, I sort of wonder if it’ll affect me that much, given how poorly I’m sleeping now.

Grumpy. But I have pretty toenails.

Week 27, day 7

Last night me and Raisin shared a steak, then I had a bowl of chocolate ice cream (Raisy didn’t get any of that, dogs can’t have chocolate). I read a book for awhile, talked on the phone to Barry a bit, wrote some email, then fell asleep at 10:30. I slept well, which was a nice treat. Now I’m up, having coffee, and considering today’s plan. I’m thinking clean house some, make pumpkin muffins, then who knows.

The dog will need her two 20-minute walks and I should call her rehab coach to see if they want me to bring her in. They said once she can do two 20-minutes walks a day, they might remove her cast and replace it with a smaller one. Her little toes itch like crazy, so that’d be nice. Plus, she sure is a stinky dog, and I’d love to give her a bath (maybe I could wrap a smaller cast in seran wrap or something and get her cleaned up).

I had my bi-weekly pregnancy massage yesterday, and it was sure nice to know that it was paid for as part of a planned budget. I was raised with something of a secular puritan ethic, so, though I do enjoy stuff like facials, pedicures, and massage (not to mention vacations, meals out, personal training, and purchasing clothing), I’ve always felt that I was doing something slightly sinful when I allowed myself these things. Not because enjoyable things/activities are wrong per se, but because we need to save money for child care and the mortgage and food.

I would be living way above my means, of course, if I bought all of the things on that list every month. But (barring a dire situation) to live with none of the visceral pleasures that life offers is not the way to financial peace – creating a line item budget with a small allocation for luxury is. It’s like eating all bean sprouts versus eating a balanced diet that includes a little chocolate.

Anyhow, the massage was great, and I had a clear conscience about it. No wonder I slept well.

Week 27, day 6

There’s a big fire in Palm Springs. It’s killed four firefighters, last I heard. Apparently it was intentionally set, though I haven’t heard how they know that. I knew that there was a fire the minute I walked out of the office yesterday, because the air was hazy in the way that is only caused by a conflageration.

It brings to mind the San Diego fires of several years ago, which were aweful for everybody, even those of us who didn’t lose anybody or anything. My prayers are with the loved ones of those who were killed, and with those people who are still fighting.

God, I just realized that I have an ex-friend (he went from saying he adored me to bored of me in ten seconds flat) whose partner works up there fighting fires. Even though I am hurt that he ditched our friendship, I hope so much that his guy is OK.

Barry and I slept in a bit this morning and then took the dog for a nice walk, and then he made me eggs. Then off to work. He leaves later today. I hate it when he leaves (when *I* leave town, however, I am just fine). I guess I’m always cognizant lately that I would miss him soooooo terribly much if anything happened to him, and his being away makes that more poignant.

I hate it that human life is so fragile. But I guess that also makes it lovely. Shit.

Week 27, day 5

It makes sense if I think about it, but I wasn’t aware that you can actually see an unborn baby kicking from the outside. Thunk. Weird. That’s the coolest thing so far.

Last night I crashed at 9:30. I was sooooo tired. But then I woke up at 1:30 and had a hard time going back to sleep. C’mon body, let’s get some rest!

Barry is out of town for the weekend. Sigh. Me ‘n’ Raisy don’t like it when he’s gone. Not that I’m overly concerned, but San Diego is getting more dangerous and I feel safer having my man next to me in bed (and the gun safe next to him). Plus, we’ll just plain miss him.

Week 27, day 4

I only woke up ONCE to pee last night, at 4am. Yeah! I feel so rested.

Raisin is being very good about doing her physical therapy, which involves 15 minutes of walking with all 4 legs twice a day. The rest of the time we let her hop around. We’re noticing that she’s also using her injured leg sometimes on her own. You would not believe how hard it is to get a dog to learn a command for using all four legs.

Raisin is sort of like a cross between a cement mixer (full of rocks, especially in her head) and Fabio (“I love me!”).

The small monkey is a real kicker, boy. I can’t wait to meet this kid!

Week 27, day 3

I had a nice time last night with my pregnancy group. I’d never met these ladies before, and was happy to discover that they are a friendly, warm, and intelligent bunch. Also one of the fittest groups of women I’ve met in awhile, pregnant or not – one of them had done a six mile run that weekend. Two of the women were about 33 weeks pregnant, and one was 20 weeks along, so we all had lots to share.

One thing I learned is that not every pregnant woman has to pee two point five million times per day and every three hours at night. I wonder what’s up with me? An overactive bladder? Or just the way my bladder is situated vis a vis my uterus? It’s tiring me out.

Anyhow, I woke up tired and grumpy and sort of itchy and puffy today – allergic stuff and just general blahs. Happily, I have my secret 45 minute trick – 20 minutes of cardio and 25 minutes of weights – and now I feel much better. It’s a little known fact that exercise improves allergy symptoms because it causes one’s body to release cortisol, plus the increased circulation is beneficial. Amazing stuff, movement – it does so much more than give one a scintilatingly hot body like mine (ha ha).

I had a photo shoot yesterday. I used to enjoy modeling, but studio work is sort of like going to the dentist at this point – a little unpleasant, but the results are worth the trouble. I’m going once a month to shoot with the same photographer. We’re doing the same series of photos each time, so at the end it’ll be kinda cool to see the progression of the pregnancy.

Week 27, day 2

I’m beat today. Repeated nights of waking every couple of hours are wearing me down. I suppose I’d best get used to it.

I took my naval piercing out last night. Now I just have a hole in my belly. Weird. I’ve had that thing for almost 6 years. I can’t decide if I miss it or not.

Tonight I’m meeting a few women I haven’t met before. It’s through that meetup.com site and it’s a pregnancy group. I’m excited to potentially make some new friends.

I’m too worn out to type more.

Week 27, day 1

I sure am having a nice weekend. Yesterday (Saturday), Barry stalked (but didn’t manage to kill any) quail and I took Raisin to meet a friend for coffee. Then I did grocery shopping, returned books to the library, and made a big batch of manicotti.

Well, sort of manicotti. But I am too lazy to stuff the shells. I like this dish because it’s easy and I can vary it every time I make it by changing what meat, spices, cheeses, and veggies I choose.

I just make a pot of red sauce (I used onion, garlic, spicy turkey sausage, tomatoes, tomato sauce, and italian seasoning this time) and a big bowl of cheezy filling (I used nonfat cottage cheese, mozzerella, romano, and spinach). Then I layer red sauce, uncooked pasta (I used manicotti because I like how they grab the sauce, but lasagna or another variant would also work), cheezy goodness, and red sauce. I pour in some liquid (wine or chicken broth – I used a $2 cabernet) to give the pasta some liquid to work with, cover tightly with tinfoil, and bake  at 375 for an hour. Then I remove the tinfoil, sprinkle on some grated romano, and bake it at 425 for another half-hour.

It’s really good. It freezes well. It takes about 20 minutes of hands-on work. We now have about 10 meals worth of manicotti, six meals of meatloaf, and six meals of red beans and rice. What next?

Gotta go, husband needs to check the surf report.